A Black Lady Sketch Show: Purgatory Soul Food (Full Sketch) | HBO
♪ (MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ Soul food Saturday!
Saturday for soul food! Finally, we have a place
in the hood that is actually owned
by black folks.
I heard the ox tails I heard the ox tails
are to die for. (SOFTLY) Oh, I can’t wait. -Oh, hi, table for two.
-Oh, hey babies, read the sign. Oh, wait a minute,
is this a… -“Sit wherever.”
-Oh. That’s okay,
the sign probably just fell -on the floor, so…
-Yeah. -Alright, girl.
-Alright. We ’bout to tip 40 percent and give them
a six-star Yelp review. -Okay.
-Because they deserve. It’s hard to open a business
in the hood. Shit, my aunt’s daycare
got shut down. And that’s just ’cause
it was a casino. Also her hands could shuffle
fast though, she’s smart. Alright, dumplings,
just give me a minute, -I’m the only one working.
-Oh, okay. See, this why we have
to support. (WHISPERS) That’s the reason. If we just come here
57 more times, they will be able
to have more servers. On the bright side,
business is booming. So let’s see what these
ox tails are talkin’ ’bout. -Talkin’ ’bout.
-Okay, sugar plums, I’m back. Now, before I get started, -we’re out of a few things.
-That’s okay. The whole left side of the menu. -That’s no problem, no problem.
-No problem. Um, I will have
the mac and cheese, sweet potatoes,
and a garden salad. Okay, my little precious moment,
I got you. And I’ll have your famous
ox tails, -and to drink we’d like–
-Oh. You order your drinks at
the counter from the drink lady. (WHISPERS) Oh, drink lady. Hi, can we have, um, two sweet teas
with extra ice, please? Only got warm sweet tea. -But you have ice, right?
-Only for the iced tea. So you have unsweetened
iced tea, but if we want sweet tea
we cannot get ice? Correct. You know what, we don’t need all that sugar
-So, two iced teas. Two hot teas, got it. -I see what’s happening.
-I don’t. She’s trying to hook us up
with the good shit. Oh. -Yeah, two hot teas, please.
-Okay, two. Two hot teas. Okay, I think she heard us. (GROANS) That tea ran through me
like the feds through my aunt’s baby casino. Excuse me,
where’s your bathroom? Costs a quarter to get in,
quarter to get out. -I don’t have no change.
-Me neither, girl. Just hold it, for the culture. Here you go, muffin tops.
Sorry about the wait. Great, can we please
get some silverware? We’re B.Y.O. silverware. This is ridiculous! Come on! All I wanted to do was support
our people, give ’em a fair shot. But I knew, I knew I should have brought
my purse for work. (WINCES) Hot. So, ladies, uh,
how you enjoy your meal? -You know what?
-The food was poppin’. -Yeah, it was.
-How ’bout I do you guys a favor and box up your leftovers
for you? -Yes, sure, thanks.
-Okay then, let me grab that -for you, I got you.
-Alright. I’ll be right back, okay? -Well that was nice.
-He’s so nice. -(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)
-Game! Uh… Who he got? I thought that nigga
was the manager. I thought that nigga
was the manager. That nigga acted like
he was the manager. Here’s your bill, cash only,
65 dollar minimum. But we only spent 37 dollars. You know what,
we came here to support, but you were out
of half the menu. Yeah,
you did not have silverware, you did not have ice
for the sweet tea. And some man just stole
our leftovers. You think you can do better? Then you go back there
and run it. -(SCOFFS)
-Fine, we will. -Very good, we can do it.
-Watch this. ♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ Gon’ be here a while. -What the fuck?
-Same, let’s go. ♪ (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) ♪ (SINGING) ♪ Soul food Saturday!
Saturday for soul food! ♪Finally, a place in the hood
that is actually owned by black folks. ♪ (MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ I heard the ox tails here
are to die for. ♪ (INTENSE HAUNTING MUSIC