Donald Trump vs. Hillary Clinton Third Debate Cold Open – SNL


♪♪♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>>GOOD EVENING.
GOOD EVENING. I’M CHRIS WALLACE.
AND WELCOME TO THE THIRD AND FINAL PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A LOT LIKE THE THIRD “LORD OF THE
RINGS” MOVIE. YOU DON’T REALLY WANT TO WATCH,
BUT HEY, YOU’VE COME THIS FAR. NOW LET’S WELCOME THE
CANDIDATES. DONALD J. TRUMP AND SECRETARY
HILLARY CLINTON. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>HELLO, CHRIS. THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME.
IN THE FIRST DEBATE, I SET THE TABLE.
IN THE SECOND DEBATE, I FIRED UP THE GRILL.
AND TONIGHT, I FEAST.>>CHRIS, I’M GOING TO START
THIS DEBATE IN THE QUIETEST VOICE POSSIBLE.
IN THE PAST, I HAVE BEEN BIG AND LOUD.
BUT TONIGHT, I AM A SWEET LITTLE BABY TRUMP.
>>THAT IS GOOD TO HEAR. OUR FIRST QUESTION IS FOR YOU
AND IT IS ABOUT REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS —
>>THEY’RE RIPPING BABIES OUT OF VAGINAS!
>>LISTEN, CHRIS. I’M GLAD YOU RAISED THIS TOPIC
BECAUSE WHAT TWO BETTER PEOPLE ARE THERE TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN’S
ISSUES? ME, A WOMAN WHO HAS HAD A CHILD
AND HAS TAKEN BIRTH CONTROL. AND HIM, A MAN WHO IS A CHILD
AND WHOSE FACE IS BIRTH CONTROL. [ LAUGHTER ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>AND WE’RE OFF TO THE RACES.
LET’S TALK IMMIGRATION. MR. TRUMP, WHY ARE YOUR
IMMIGRATION POLICIES BETTER THAN SECRETARY CLINTON’S?
>>BECAUSE SHE WANTS OPEN BORDERS AND THAT IS CRAZY.
I MEAN, PEOPLE ARE JUST POURING INTO THIS COUNTRY FROM MEXICO
AND A LOT OF THEM ARE VERY BAD HOMBRES.
>>OH, BINGO, BINGO, I GOT BINGO!
[ LAUGHTER ] I’VE BEEN PLAYING ALL YEAR AND I
GOT IT. BAD HOMBRES, RAPISTS, MISS
PIGGY, THEY’RE ALL LIVING IN HELL, EXAMINE AND IF SHE WASN’T
MY DAUGHTER. [ LAUGHTER ]
>>CONGRATULATIONS, SECRETARY CLINTON.
MR. TRUMP, PLEASE CONTINUE.>>I HAVE A FANTASTIC
RELATIONSHIP WITH MEXICO. I HAVE PERSONALLY MET WITH THE
MEXICAN PRESIDENT, I FORGET HIS NAME, I THINK IT WAS SOMETHING
LIKE MR. GUACAMOLE. I’M SORRY, EXCUSE ME.
SENOR GUACAMOLE. I ALSO MET HEREWITH BEAUTIFUL
WIFE TEQUITA. AND THEIR TWIN CHILDREN CHIPS
AND SALSA.>>CHRIS, HERE IS THE TRUTH.
DONALD SAID HE WAS GOING TO BE TOUGH ON MEXICO, BUT WHEN HE MET
WITH THE PRESIDENT, HE CHOKED.>>WRONG.
TRADEMARKED.>>HE SAID HE’S GOING TO BE
TOUGH ON RUSSIA BUT HE’S BASICALLY PUTIN’S PUPPET.
>>LIAR, TRADEMARK.>>HE’S PROMISED TO ARE TOUGH ON
ISIS BUT HE’S NEVER EXPLAINED HOW.
>>THAT’S NOT EXACTLY TRUE. HIRES EXACTLY WHAT I’LL DO.
FIRST OFF SNIFF MOSUL IS SAD SNIFF AND WE’RE GOING AFTER
MOSUL BECAUSE ISIS IS IN MOSUL BUT SHE CREATED ISIS.
SNIFF IRAN SHOULD WRITE US A LETTER OF THANK YOU BECAUSE IRAN
IS TAKING IRAQ AND WE’RE GOING TO MOSUL AND IRAN’S GOING TO
WRITE US A LETTER OF LISTEN ALEPPO IS A DISASTER AND IRAN IS
IRAQ SNIFF AND ISIS –>>MR. TRUMP, WE HAVE TO MOVE
ON.>>OH THANK GOD.
[ LAUGHTER ] I DON’T KNOW IF YOU COULD TELL
BUT I WAS REALLY SPINNING OUT OF CONTROL.
>>SECRETARY CLINTON, NOW, I’D LIKE TO ASK YOU ABOUT AN ONGOING
ISSUE FOR YOUR CAMPAIGN. WIKILEAKS HAS BEEN RELEASING
YOUR CAMPAIGN E-MAILS, MANY OF WHICH RAISE SOME SERIOUS
QUESTIONS.>>THANK YOU FOR BRINGING UP MY
E-MAILS, CHRIS. AND I’M VERY HAPPY TO CLARIFY
WHAT WAS IN SOME OF THEM. SORRY, WHAT, CAROL?
WHAT? I’M SORRY, I THOUGHT I HEARD MY
FRIEND CAROL. ANYWAY, BACK TO YOUR QUESTION
ABOUT THE WAY DONALD TREATS WOMEN.
[ LAUGHTER ] AND THAT IS HOW YOU BY VOT.
PIVOT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>>SO YOU’RE JUST NEVER GOING TO ANSWER A QUESTION ABOUT YOUR
E-MAILS.>>NO, BUT IT WAS VERY CUTE TO
WATCH YOU TRY.>>NOW MR. TRUMP, IN THE LAST
WEEK, 11 WOMEN ACCUSE YOU OF SEXUALLY ASSAULTING THEM.
DO YOU STILL DENY EACH OF THOSE CLAIMS?
>>CHRIS, OF COURSE I DO. I’M COMPLETELY INNOCENT.
I’VE SAID THIS BEFORE AND I’LL SAY IT AGAIN.
NOBODY HAS MORE RESPECT FOR WOMEN THAN I DO.
[ LAUGHTER ]>>ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, SETTLE
DOWN. SETTLE DOWN, SETTLE DOWN, ENTIRE
PLANET, SETTLE DOWN. OUR NEXT QUESTION IS ABOUT THE
ECONOMY. MR. TRUMP, WHY ARE YOU BETTER
EQUIPPED THAN SECRETARY CLINTON TO FIX THE ECONOMY?
>>BECAUSE HILLARY HAS NO IDEA HOW TO FIX ANYTHING.
IF SHE DID SHE WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY.
I MEAN, WHAT HAS SHE BEEN DOING —
>>DONALD, NO, NO, DONALD, DON’T SET HER UP —
>>I’D BE HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT THE LAST 30 YEARS.
>>OH, NO. NOT AGAIN.
>>BACK IN THE 1970s, I WORKED FOR THE CHILDREN’S DEFENSE FUND.
>>YES, YES, WE KNOW.>>I WAS A SENATOR IN NEW YORK
ON 9/11.>>YEAH, WE GET IT.
>>AND I WAS SECRETARY OF STATE AND I DON’T KNOW IF YOU’VE HEARD
THIS BEFORE –>>WE HAVE.
>>BUT I WAS INSTRUMENTAL IN TAKING DOWN A MAN BY THE NAME
OF –>>OSAMA BIN LADEN.
>>OSAMA! BIN!
LADEN! [ LAUGHTER ]
[ APPLAUSE ]>>WE’RE ALL VERY PROUD OF YOUR
ACCOMPLISHMENTS, SECRETARY.>>CHRIS, SHE CAN BRAG ABOUT HER
RESUME BUT I’M THE ONE WHO’S GOT ALL THE HEAVY HITTERS SUPPORTING
ME. I MEAN, I HAVE GOT THE CREAM OF
THE CROP. I’VE GOT SARAH PALIN.
I’VE GOT CHACHI. GET THIS I’VE EVEN GOT THE BEST
BALDWIN BROTHER, STEPHEN BALDWIN.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>>SECRETARY CLINTON. SECRETARY CLINTON, LET’S MOVE ON
TO ENTITLEMENTS. WILL YOU RAISE TAXES TO SAVE
PROGRAMS LIKE SOCIAL SECURITY AND MEDICARE?
>>YES, BUT ONLY ON THE VERY WEALTHY.
FOR EXAMPLE, MY CONTRIBUTIONS WILL GO UP AS WILL DONALD’S,
ASSUMING HE DOESN’T FIGURE OUT A WAY TO GET OUT OF THAT —
>>SUCH A NASTY WOMAN.>>WHOA, WHOA, MR. TRUMP.
MR. TRUMP, THAT WAS INCREDIBLY RUDE TO SECRETARY CLINTON.
>>THANK YOU, CHRIS. THAT’S EXACTLY THE KIND OF
LANGUAGE THAT HAS POISONED AND DEBASED THIS ELECTION.
AND IF YOU AGREE, GO TO HILLARYCLINTON.COM AND BUY A
LIMITED EDITION NASTY WOMAN MUG. [ LAUGHTER ]
>>NOW WE HAVE TO TURN TO THE BIG STORY OF THE WEEK.
MR. TRUMP, IT HAS BECOME VERY CLEAR THAT YOU’RE PROBABLY GOING
TO LOSE.>>CORRECT.
[ LAUGHTER ]>>NOW, WHEN YOU DO, WILL YOU
ACCEPT THE RESULTS OF THE ELECTION?
>>I WILL LOOK AT IT AT THE TIME.
BECAUSE FRANKLY THIS WHOLE THING IS RIGGED.
EVEN THE MEDIA. EVERY DAY I TURN ON THE NEWS AND
ALL OF THE NEWSCASTERS ARE MAKING ME LOOK SO BAD.
>>AND HOW ARE WE DOING THAT?>>BY TAKING ALL OF THE THINGS I
SAY AND ALL OF THE THINGS I DO AND PUTTING THEM ON TV.
[ LAUGHTER ]>>DONALD, LISTEN, I’M TRYING TO
HELP YOU, BUDDY. SO REPEAT AFTER ME.
I, DONALD TRUMP –>>I, THE BEST-EVER DONALD
TRUMP.>>PROMISE TO ACCEPT —
>>PROMISE TO ACCEPT.>>THE RESULTS OF THIS ELECTION.
>>THE RESULTS OF THIS ELECTION. FY WIN.
GOT YOU, LOSER, TRADEMARK. [ LAUGHTER ]
>>CHRIS WHAT HE HAS JUST SAID IS HORRIFYING.
AND THAT’S WHY AMERICANS HAVE AN IMPORTANT DECISION TO MAKE.
BETWEEN THE TWO OF US, WHO DO YOU TRUST TO BE YOUR PRESIDENT?
THE REPUBLICAN OR DONALD TRUMP? [ LAUGHTER ]
>>THANK YOU, SECRETARY. NOW, WE ARE ALMOST OUT OF
TIME –>>WE ARE?
OH, NO. LET ME JUST MAKE SURE THAT I
SAID EVERYTHING THAT I WANTED TO SAY.
OKAY, I’M GOOD. I’M GOOD.
>>NOW BEFORE WE CONCLUDE, YOU EACH WILL HAVE ONE MINUTE FOR
YOUR CLOSING STATEMENTS. MR. TRUMP, WE’LL START WITH YOU.
>>THANK YOU, CHRIS. THANK YOU TO ALL OF MY
SUPPORTERS. BECAUSE OF YOU, I AM WINNING IN
EVERY SINGLE POLL TAKEN OUTSIDE OF A CRACKER BARREL.
>>SECRETARY CLINTON.>>LISTEN, AMERICA.
DONALD TRUMP CANNOT BE PRESIDENT.
HE WOULD BE A DISASTER. A FAILURE.
A COMPLETE “F.” AND AMERICA, YOU DESERVE BETTER
THAN AN “F.” SO ON NOVEMBER 8th, VOTE FOR ME
AND I PROMISE I WILL BE A STONE-COLD “B.”
[ LAUGHTER ]>>THEN ON NOVEMBER 9th, MAKE
SURE TO CHECK OUT TRUMP TV, YOU’RE GOING TO HATE IT.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT!

100 comments

  • George Solano

    Watch "Malcolm X : White Liberals and Conservatives" on YouTube
    https://youtu.be/T3PaqxblOx0

    Reply
  • Mike Pearlstein

    remember when she lost? the smarm in this makes it all the better that she lost.

    Reply
  • Aditya Narayan

    Somehow people chose the Trump than the Nasty Woman, because the Nasty Woman couldn't be trusted.

    Reply
  • wakazzzful

    Trump 2020!!! Woooo!!

    Reply
  • DJ MASK

    When she said Osama bin laden I died😂😂😂

    Reply
  • Jettt Angel

    The only thing Hillary is feasting on is children

    Reply
  • Arrex Rong

    one year till the next…

    Reply
  • M3A2uploads

    is that Tom Hanks?

    Reply
  • M3A2uploads

    is that Tom Hanks?

    Reply
  • M3A2uploads

    is that Tom Hanks?

    Reply
  • ptavangar

    There is evidence to suggest that Trump is a habitual drug abuser. Pseudoephedrine, cocaine, amphetamines are his drugs or choice it seems. That's the prevailing theory as to why he kept sniffing. Also, sometimes he is "on" Trump and sometimes he is come down Trump where he slurs his words and appears to be depressed. Classic behavior of someone who uses stimulants… Just saying…

    Reply
  • Peggy Sinclair

    Trump snorts cocaine – must be too much cocaine – his mind is traveling – comfortably numb

    Reply
  • Blaise Akenji

    baldwin's hands are actually as small as Trumps'

    Reply
  • brian bowes

    see that hilly blowin' the phone

    Reply
  • Col. Aureliano

    the woman playing hillary is terrible.

    Reply
  • Scary yo

    Me

    Reply
  • TCY !

    Thank gos Trump won and will win again!

    Reply
  • ParkerIsYourDad :D

    Why didn’t they roast on Clinton?

    Reply
  • Tony Ayala

    Trump let isis free now!!!!

    Reply
  • Curious George

    They kinda are keeping babies alive after abortion for more money. He was right about that

    Reply
  • Medicated

    Can we just let snl die already, I can no longer remember when snl was funny.. Just end it already!

    Reply
  • Jake Sydney

    So this is where all the baby rapers work now. What a shit show. 🖕

    Reply
  • thesmoothdoran

    I was really hoping to laugh at this since I've seen a lot of very funny parodies of the presidential debates as well as nomination debates, and while this video may have had one or two moments that I chuckled at, it was mostly just making fun of trump for the sake of making fun of trump. rather than appealing to a lot of people, it was more like "god, I hate trump so much, lets make him say something stupid and call him an idiot" for pretty much the whole thing. that's great and all, I'm sure the people who hate him probably liked that a lot, but it wasn't much of a comedic thing as it was a shit slinging thing. hardly anything was thrown at Hillary. If anything, maybe one or two of the things she said were actually negative things that they made fun of, but for the most part it was extremely skewed against trump. for real, tho, the bad lip sync video over the presidential debates was way funnier. watch that instead.

    Reply
  • Platerpus7

    Oh SNL, you tried real hard

    Reply
  • Ruta Vitello

    Go go go Trump you got 😁😂😀😂😂

    Reply
  • Robert Desmond

    Defending these pedophile criminals. The one's that scream the loudest , well you know. I wonder how many other that Baldwin are on Jeff Epstein's list???? The Strom has arrived, pain is coming. No Deals. Gitmo short drop quick stop.

    Reply
  • Miles the MAN

    This is wayyy funnier now

    Reply
  • Chinmay Kargutkar

    Next debate coming up. Youtube be like watch this: Donald Trump vs. Hillary Clinton Third Debate Cold Open – SNL!

    Reply
  • Five Nights At Freddy’s Gaming

    This is amazing and spot on! Too bad I wear glasses and can't imitate Trump as he doesn't wear glasses.

    Reply
  • anthonymarcus48

    Its funny watching this from 10/11/19 after everything Trump has done for the good of America and the world.

    Reply
  • Stepan Bandera

    Kate is a huge part of why SNL is not funny anymore. Sad.

    Reply
  • Kathryn Molesa

    The polls were right!
    Oh wait…

    Reply
  • Sabine Ekaterina Müller

    Wow good go to "Hillary"

    Reply
  • Sabine Ekaterina Müller

    Bingo!

    Reply
  • Sergio Vasquez

    I hope she runs again!

    Reply
  • Christopher Norris

    It's only funny because he kicked her ass.

    Reply
  • Original Tanman

    And he won👌🏽

    Reply
  • John Riedel

    #Trump2020 😂

    Reply
  • Mike Erickson

    Holy crap I almost didn't recognize Tom Hanks.

    Reply
  • Jason Goldstein

    7:25 I don't think so! 🙂

    Reply
  • Wyatt Laporte

    she is so adorable at 2:23

    Reply
  • Wyatt Laporte

    Laughter is the only medicine under this psychotic Alice in Wonderland administration.

    Reply
  • Milo Bunny

    Tom Hanks mouth. God what happened.

    Reply
  • Hugo Guggenheim

    DONT WE ALL WISH TRUMP WAS JUST NEVER BORN????

    Reply
  • Joseph Adamack

    ………and Trump got elected….so funny !

    Reply
  • scott left

    How strange, all this came true, 3rd trimester abortions and even proof that live births will left to die and the culprits not prosecuted, Dems open border policy, Russia hoax exposed, ISIS destroyed, AND ELECTION RESULTS NOT ACCEPTED….Hillary?!

    Reply
  • Cant_Touch_This

    8:19

    “Between the Republican or Donald Trump.”

    This is why the Democrats have lost because they’re lite Republicans.

    Reply
  • Ownage Prank

    2019 By now Hillary Clinton's Boobs must be dropping to her knees

    Reply
  • gelmann

    Guacamole and their kids chips and Salsa ! So funny…meanwhile Trump IS President – Thank God it's not Hillary or Warren ! !

    Reply
  • Cathy Ferguson

    Watching this in 2019…..great job SNL

    Reply
  • Lasse Nørgård

    What Forrest said about LOTR is blasbhemy! Oh well he is not right in the head so I'll give him a brake.

    Reply
  • Horn kjell

    Trump won because of "bad" exposure like this. Hah ain't that funny.

    Reply
  • Amy Shaw

    I love our President Trump!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  • Angry Scotsman

    Chris Wallace is a douchebag and so is Tom Hanks

    Reply
  • Jonathan Smith

    She is like this in real life to crazy as hell. And drops the mic more then she did in the 90s. Lol

    Reply
  • BROperatorTIME

    Lmao this didn't age well. Haha

    Reply
  • Jesse Webb

    This isn't even funny. Donald Trump will always win because the side that hates him is mentally slow.

    Reply
  • Rion Shellooe

    I’m so glad trump won after watching this

    Reply
  • KING LEONIDAS

    Kate is gorgeous! Hillary is not.

    Reply
  • Alexander Aggadi

    "Mr. Trump, you're probably going to lose" Awkward!

    Reply
  • gomi saburo

    I guess they should have asked Hillary if she was going to accept the results. Oh, she was asked that question…but not by SNL…

    Reply
  • soph4930 soph4930

    Who is better? Donald trump= like
    Hillary Clinton= Comment
    None= Dislike

    Reply
  • RisenPhoenix68

    Repeat after me, "We, the Democrat Progressive Neo Communists, accept the results of the 2016 election and will not in any way put on masks and violently attack Conservatives at their meetings".

    Reply
  • Annissa

    Them trying to make this woman tolerable is repugnant! But what else is expected from the satanists who own all of the media!!🤮🤬🤢

    Reply
  • Creat Ion

    TRUMP IS YPUR PRESIDENT FOR THE NEXT 4 YEARS AT LEAST ! And forever when he changes the presidential term to life. FU bitches we killed killary killinton and next is you lefty looneys.

    Reply
  • Goldclaw837

    Hey Crooked Hillary, you lost,President Trump is WINNING!👌🇺🇸

    Reply
  • Vishwajeet Pandey

    I will accept….if I win 😂😂😜

    Reply
  • Master Sergeant

    It’s so funny to know these people are eating their words in 2019.

    Reply
  • A Cost

    Even funnier because Trump won and will win again !!

    Reply
  • knightstalker1369 2.0

    SNL SUX. BTW, who won?🤔 President Donald J. Trump!😁😂🤣

    Reply
  • knightstalker1369 2.0

    Yeah and who didn't accept the results?🤔🤗

    Reply
  • Lauren-Kate Kush

    Watching in 2019 and Trump is about to get a Chris Wallace fired from Fox🤷‍♀️

    Reply
  • Narc Slayer

    Oh…. still love this in 2019. STILL WINNING. #Trump2020

    Reply
  • Big Jake

    Snl trying so hard to bash in trump

    Reply
  • Wafer34

    Fuck trump

    Reply
  • tampajohn

    How’d that work out for ya SNL?

    Reply
  • David Mankarios

    This aged well, especially since he will win in 2020.

    Reply
  • David Reeves

    Your gonna loose …sikeeeeeee

    Reply
  • Xyce Bedet

    Trump won, losers.

    Reply
  • lilieth cameron

    You're damn right it is rigged. That's the only way he had a chance of winning. And this was funny as hell.

    Reply
  • Xyce Bedet

    She was instrumental in killing OBL? What the fuck does that even mean? She was just Secretary of State when OBL was killed by our Special Forces. She had about as much to do with his death as the White House janitor. And SNL seriously listed her being a Senator when 9/11 happened as another accomplishment? What kind of fucking accomplishment is that? And the only reason she was Senator was because she was married to Bill Clinton. That's it.

    Reply
  • Mikey Virtnan

    Baldwin sucks and isn't funny.

    Reply
  • Johnny Duke Carroll

    Ha

    Reply
  • Altemimi123

    Just imagining Trump's and Hillary's faces when they watch this.

    Reply
  • Alex Jeffries

    Oh the irony in 2019

    Reply
  • Holland Meester

    Hillary, if you are not able to defeat Trump, you are not fit to become Mistress President………

    Reply
  • Gem Scarbrough

    A Joke.

    Reply
  • Black [Q] Widow

    Is this supposed to be humorous?

    Reply
  • lpucho

    Weak ass jokes

    Reply
  • Mary loves karma

    "Donald Trump cannot be president. It would be a disaster, a failure, a complete F" ahh too damn true

    Reply
  • Zubair Razzaq

    Tom Hanks is best he makes one of best snl show

    Reply
  • D G

    Who is laughing now……..LOL

    Reply
  • Joseph Fox

    And now Trump is God Emperor and will do down as one of the greatest in the pantheon of Presidents. Hillary was exposed as the biggest loser in history.

    Reply
  • Mattathias Macabees

    We all lost… Either way- we lost

    Reply
  • Sam Donovan

    My favorite part of this is when he says you’re probably going to lose and thinking about how he won

    Reply
  • Golden 47

    I want to see TRUMP VS BERNIE SNL SKIT
    Larry and Alec are going to be hilarious in a debate

    Reply
  • James Miller

    Well he accepted the results.

    Reply
  • B. S.

    Wait didn't Trump win the election?

    Reply
  • Sports Hilites

    At least we now know how Patriots fans felt after Super Bowl XLII if you were pro-Hillary. Nothing is ever certain.

    Reply
  • Sports Hilites

    Say what you like, but Donald Trump expected to lose the election, but come out the biggest winner ideologically and brand-wise.

    Reply

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