The CH Cast’s Favorite Sketches of 2017


(upbeat music) – My favorite video
from this past year was Don’t Eat the Laundry Pods by Zac Oyama. It’s so weird, and I think very funny, and beautifully shot. It’s also invariably the one sketch that when I am visiting old
friends or meeting people, it’s always the one they bring up, they’re like, man, that laundry pods sketch, what the fuck was that? I loved it. And, “what the fuck was that, I loved it” is I guess kind of what we’re going for, so. Enjoy. – You up to anything tonight? – Uh, no. Probably just going to go home and catch up on some laundry. – You know, someone left
a bunch of free samples of those laundry pods, if you want to try them out. – Oh, yeah. Cool. – Yeah, just don’t eat any, okay? – What? – Nothing, it was a dumb joke. They’re kind of brightly
colored little gel things, kids eat them sometimes. They’re super toxic. – Oh, yeah. Yikes. – Anyway, uh. Have a good night. – You too. (contemplative music) (hand squeaking against table) What’s the deal with these? Hmm. Like a big old Gusher. Anyone here? Or… Everyone go home? Boop, boop, boop. (laughs) A firm pod, aren’t you? A candy ravioli. Probably really bad for you. No. (scoffs) That’d be gross. That’d be gross to eat. Bleh. What? (laughs) Where’d you come from? Nah, that’s gross. (typing) Hmm. That’s probably just kids, though. Hmm. Probably just sick adults already. Kind of weak adults. I can eat you, right? This part’s grape flavored, and this is orange flavored, and this is vanilla. So. All flavor. – Forgot my wallet. – Me too. I forgot my wallet. – Okay. Um. – I’m looking for it on this table. – Well, I’m just gonna, I’m just gonna grab it here. Okay. Well, goodnight. – Goodnight. So you’re saying that, with 100% certainty, that if I ate a laundry pod, I’d get super poisoned and possibly die? Yeah. Okay, I got it. What if I took a little bite? That’s not funny? (contemplative music) (playful music) (screaming) I can’t! I can’t. I… You’re just beautiful poison. And I know you want it, but, I have to go. Do laundry. Goodbye, laundry pods. (mournful music) (elevator doors) (triumphant music) (popping, squelching) (sirens) – Ally wrote my favorite sketch of 2017, which was, 7-Way Meet Cute. I think it’s my favorite because I had so much fun on set that day, and also my dog was a
cast member that day. Wetzel Kurtovich. Be on the lookout. She’s going to be huge someday. (hopeful music) – Oh!
– Oh! – Sorry! – Oh, no! It was my fault. I’m really coffee before
I’ve had any clumsy. I mean, (laughs) – Oh.
– Oh. – Um. Anyway, what’s your name? – Oh!
– Oh, shit! – I’m sorry, I’m so coffee. There’s no clumsy. I mean, – No, it was my fault. (hopeful music) – [All] Oh. (school bell) (awkward laughter) – This damn thing. – [All] I had this locker last year. (thump) – Thanks. – [All] Oh. You have something in your hair. – Oh, there it is. Oh, we got it suck. – Oh. – Oh, it’s still there. – Oh. (laughter) – [All] Oh. (laughter) – [Overlapping] Oh, oh. (thump) – Ow! – [All Four] Hey, watch it, asshole? Are you okay? – I think so. (gasp) – [All Four] You’re hurt! – No, I’m fine. – [All Four] Here, let me. (squelching) – Sorry. I didn’t even see you there. – [All Five] Of course you didn’t, Zac. I’m invisible to guys like you. I mean, you’re so cool and I just wear glasses. (hopeful music) – Wow. You’re beautiful now. (bark) – Whoa! – [All Six] Whoa! Whoaaa, whoa! – [All Seven] My bag of loose oranges and one french baguette! Hey. Do we know each other? I’m
(names overlapping) I’m
(names overlapping) So, do you have a boyfriend? Yeah. Me, too! It would be crazy if it was the same guy. One, two, three, Chad. Chad? Chad Horsley? Yeah! He’s dating us at the same time? That motherfucker! He has seemed distant lately. You know what would show him? We should date. (motorcycle revving) – [All Seven] Hey, wait! I can explain! – Fuck off, Chad! Now I’m dating (listing names) – My favorite sketch is Guy Who Returns to Facebook, which was written by Zac. I love that sketch because Zac is so good at doing that character, and there’s this one, very like echolalically satisfying part where he just keeps
repeating the same line over and over. ‘What do you think about that?’ ‘What do you think about that?’ ‘What do you think about that?’ ‘What do you think about that?’ And like walking from one
end of frame to the other over and over again. It’s so stupid. And I love it so much. – Okay, Grant, I give up. Tell me. – This side’s up. – Oh, yes! – Oh, whoa, I hardly recognize this place. – Blake. Guys, Blake’s back. – What? He’s here? I thought he deleted his Facebook. – I did. I deleted my Facebook, just for a little while. What can I say? Really put everything into perspective. – Put everything into perspective? – What was it like? – When you delete your Facebook, just for a little while, you gain peace, like, I don’t know. There’s a whole world out there. Like, I read books and I saw movies. – Whoa. – Yeah, but you don’t need to delete your Facebook to do that. You can just, you can just do that. – I think it’s just like
a life without Facebook is a life that’s pure. I don’t know. I just feel like I can breathe again. Does that make me sound lame? – No. – Kind of. – Not at all. – Really? – No.
– No, it doesn’t. – Oh. I guess I am amazing. – You sound so cool.
– You, honestly are so cool right now. – I’m sorry. How does leaving Facebook
change your life so much? – One more time? – How does leaving Facebook
change your life so much? – One more time? – How could leaving Facebook possibly change your life so much? – One more time? – Why does leaving Facebook- – That’s a good question, Michael Trapp. – Yeah. – Well, I just feel recharged. Like, these past nine days have like, really changed everything. Like, um, look. I even meditated. – Oh.
– Oh, my Gard. – That’s on your Instagram account. You know what, it doesn’t matter. You’re back on Facebook now.
– Yes. – Right? So, I kind of feel like
you’re just pretending you’re better than everyone else. – No. – Blake! – Oh. – Like I said, I feel like you’re pretending you’re better than everyone else. – Like instead of being on Facebook, I went on a hike. – Yeah, me too. – Ever think about that? – I just said me too. – Ever think about that? – Yes, I did it! – Ever think about that? – Yes, I’ve thought about it.
– Wow. – Ever think about that? – I posted the pictures on Facebook. – Ever think about that? – Yes. – Do you ever think about that? (yelp)
– Oh, my God! (laughter) – Do you ever think about that? – Yes. Yes, I’ve thought and I’ve done it. – How does he do it? – What the fuck is wrong with you? – He’s so cool. – And sure, I reactivated my Facebook last week to check on some messages that
I thought might be important, but I deleted it again almost right away. – Fuck off. – Hmm. I think it’s the best way to put it, is that I suddenly feel, enlightened? – No, I don’t think that
just because you deleted F- – Oh, look at that, I guess I’m floating. – No, no, no! No! What is that? – Hey, look, Blake’s back. What a fun cameo. Well, see you later, guys. – Bye, Caldwell. – I guess I did achieve enlightenment by being off Facebook for a little bit. – This is bullshit. – I guess it’s time for me to
deactivate my Facebook again. – No, Blake, don’t leave us! – What’ll we do without
your calming spirit? – Aww, my sweet Katie, my sweet Grant. – The thing about my beauty- hey. Hush. (yelps) (screams) – Katie and Grant, remember, I’ll always be on other apps. Also I’ll probably
reactivate my Facebook again in a few weeks, just to make sure I’m not missing out on any cool events. You know, like an outdoor party, or like, I don’t know, one of those city light festivals where it’s like a scavenger
hunt or something like that. – You’re not better than me! (fart noises)
Oh, I shit myself, too! Why? – Remember me! – He was too good for our world. (farting noises) – Help me! – Katie, take three. My favorite video of the year is, Jocks and Nerds are Both Underdogs that Trapp wrote. It’s got a big long, single take in the middle, where Trapp and I both say the
same thing at the same time. It took us 28 takes to get right. It was, 15 takes went by before we even came close to getting it. We only really nailed it one time. When the video came out, there were a bunch of comments saying, ‘oh, you can see a hidden cut right here,’ or ‘you can tell they’re
not in the same space because they never cross each other.’ It’s so much harder to like, digitally manipulate the image of me next to Trapp in the same space rather than just say like, yeah, you two assholes go
practice that for a couple hours. I’m super happy with how it came out. Only in the world of collegehumor am I jocky enough to be
the jock in the video. – [TV] Welcome to Superbowl
51 in Houston, Texas. Today’s matchup, the New England Patriots versus the Atlanta Falcons. Settle in, this is going to be a good one. – Ugh, sports. I will never understand
why the brainless masses get so worked up over
this pointless tribalism. Me, though? I enjoy comic books, movies, sprawling space operas. You know, intellectual pursuits. Guess I’m just too unique to understand the common folk. – Common folk, hah. You are the common folk. Nerd shit is mainstream. Your mom can name more
Avengers than she can Yankees. The truly subversive
position is to defend sports. – I don’t, no, no. Maybe two years ago. But now the backlash to
the blacklash to sports has lashed back to a backlash to a backlash
to a backlash to sports. – No! – [Both] I’m the underdog! (chip cracking) You think your little thing is so cool, but it’s not, and only I’m brave enough to call it that. Newsflash, it doesn’t have anything
to do with the real world. You’re watching a bunch of millionaires in a fake conflict orchestrated by other millionaires. What? That’s the stupidest way
you could describe it. It’s about the stories
and the human struggle, people pushing themselves
to do incredible things. Pff. You call that incredible? I call it dumb. That’s because you don’t understand it! You know, if you took the time to really learn about the intricacies of this stuff, maybe you’d appreciate it. Instead, you hover at the outskirts, criticizing the surface. Well, maybe if you didn’t use your knowledge as
a way to belittle me, I might feel more encouraged
to try your thing out. Oh, shit. I guess. I don’t mean to be exclusionary. I’m just truly passionate about it. It’s an easy way for me to relax and escape my life for a little while. To make me feel like I’m a
part of something bigger. And sure, maybe I get caught up in
the insignificant details. But it feels good to care about something. Ha! That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard! You’re an idiot! No, you’re an idiot! – [TV] Touchdown! – Whoo! – Fuck yeah. (laughs) My favorite sketch was Grant’s sketch that he wrote and was in, called “I Need More Intel:
Is That Hot Guy Gay?” It’s him and it’s Zac in a van, eating noodles in a Hawaiian shirt. I think it’s great, and there’s a line in it where Grant says, ‘Fucking confusing allies’, and I think that’s so funny because there’s so many like, “allies”, you know? But it’s like, like, how much of an ally are you, you know? Like, you want to hook up, or? Or no? – At least it’s not an avocado. (laughter) – Shut up. – I’m going to go get
something from the bar. Do you need anything? – I’ll take another bourbon. – Extra avocado, right? – Yeah!
(laughs) Bro. Are you reading this? Bro. – Copy, uh. Copy. I got visual. – This guy’s hot as fuck. I’ve got to figure out if he’s gay. Do a scan to see if he
has a Grindr profile. (typing) – No profile is found. – Check for Adam4Adam and SCRUFF as well. Oh, also, pull up his Facebook. – What’s the name? – Jordan Burns. Is that a gay name? Jordan? – A gay name? – You know, how there are gay names? Like, uh, David, Brian, Aaron. Is Jordan one of those? – I don’t know. Here’s his Facebook, though. – What’s his relationship status? – He’s single. Doesn’t say if he’s interested
in men or women, though. – That means gay, right? – Not necessarily. I mean, you know, maybe he just doesn’t like to
give out personal information. – Hmm. Paranoid. Okay, what else? Are his posts gay? – Are his- are his posts gay? – You know, like, Disney stuff, or TBT of marching band. Maybe he made his profile picture do that rainbow flag thing. – Couldn’t that just
mean he’s like an ally? – Fucking confusing allies. Alright, what do you see? – I can only see his public posts, he’s tagged in a picture of the Simpsons by one of his friends. – I feel like that’s straight. What else? Do we have mutual friends? Are they gay dudes? – No, no mutual friends. – Damn it. What’s the Instagram situation? – He’s pretty active. – Okay, that’s gay. What are the pictures? – Here’s a picture of a nice meal. – Gay. – Here’s a picture of him
with his arm around a girl. – Fuck. – Oh, here’s a picture of him shirtless with a bunch of other shirtless guys. – No, that’s a red herring. Those shirtless pictures
always end up being like a tough mudder or some
straight shit like that. Send it to me, though. – Sending. – Hmm. – [Zac] What, did you find something? – No, it’s just, his phi is so goddamn good. – Phi? – Wait. – What? – Enhance vector seven. – Enhancing. (beeps) – The waistband. He’s wearing Andrew Christian underwear. Gay dudes love Andrew Christian. – You’re looking at his
underwear waistband on Instagram? – Hey, if he’s going to post a thirst trap picture like this, I’m going to look. And you can even tell it’s pink. Pink underwear! He’s gay for sure. – That seems a little thin. – He seems a little thin. – Okay, come on. – Your bourbon? – Great. Um, hey. Speaking of bourbon, uh, would you like to get
a drink with me sometime? – Sure. – Great. Excuse me. (suspenseful music) (silenced gunshots) Geronimo. – Fuckin’ finally! – So my favorite sketch of
this year was definitely Grant Is a Huge Clutz Idiot written by Zac Oyama! I love it so much because it’s
such an accurate depiction of the way Grant lives his life. So kind of suave and
charismatic most of the time, but in reality, he is the clumsiest person
I have ever met in my life. I have seen him drop an
entire bowl of oatmeal face-first on the floor so many times. He drops so much food to the point where all
of the dogs in the office will cluster around his desk because they know that
there will be scraps there and it’s very, very funny. ♪- Breakfast time! ♪ You know I’m right. – Yes. – Okay, let’s see. (classical music) Put that ‘nana up. Oh, oh, Jesus. Spilled my coffee. Oh, boy! Yogurt on my bottom. Paper towels. Oh. Oh, boy. I don’t know, fellas. Hmm. Goodness. Oh, boy, mondays. – Grant, are you okay? – Oh, yeah, I got it. (classical music) I got it. (crash) What happened? Landed in the yogurt! – Yeah, you did. – We know. – Oh, boy. Slipped in the yogurt. Oh, dang. – Dang. – Well. I think I’m going to go take
my fourth shower for the day, and have another go at breakfast. – Hey, Grant? Thank you. – For what? – Everything. (screams) – Well. I forgot about my porcelain and slime. – You did, didn’t you?
– Yeah, we know. – My favorite video of the year was How Tall is Grant? By Mike Trapp. This video was inspired by one
of our top youtube questions, which is, how tall is Grant? Sometimes he’s like the BFG, he’s all the way to the sky, and sometimes he just seems like a normal, relatable dude. We here still have no
idea how tall Grant is. – So, we’re agreed. Trapp definitely killed Pat, and we need to call the police. – Yes. – Hey! Whatcha talkin’ about? – Nothing! – Yeah, just boring stuff. – Wait a minute. How tall is Grant? – [Grant] What do you mean? – How tall are you? Like, I feel like if I look at you like this, I can tell that you’re clearly
taller than everyone else, but, sometimes I feel like you and Katie are the same height. – You mean how in our videos, sometimes they have to frame
the camera angle around me? – No, I mean like in real life, like right now, Katie even looks like a
little bigger than you. – He looks pretty tall to me. – Wait, is Katie taller than Zac? – I don’t know, let’s see. Nope. – Well now, hold on. That doesn’t make any sense. – Why not? – Because, Katie was taller than you, but then you are taller than Zac, and now Zac is taller than Katie? And now it looks like you’re
taller than everyone else. – I am taller than everyone. – I know that. Like, I know that objectively. I’m just saying, sometimes, it looks like you’re not. Like, you’re way down here now. – Maybe it’s like a perspective thing? You know, it’s like the angle at
which you’re standing. – Maybe? Uh, okay. Can we try this? Can everyone just move
apart from each other? Katie, go move next to Grant. Now Zac. Come on! What the hell? – Does this really matter? I mean, who cares how tall Grant is? – Yeah. – Ugh. Oh, I’m losing my mind. – Oh, you know what? I’ve been crouching. Let me just stand up. – Oh, okay. Oh. – Oh, yeah. I’m also crouching. – Right. – Oh, me too. – Oh, no, no, no! Stop, stop! What is this? No! No! It’s just legs! It’s just crazy spider legs! None of this makes any sense! – Of course it makes sense. You’re looking at it. Grant. – How? – I don’t know. Zac. – Son of a bitch! – Okay, Trapp, you’re a little too worked up. We’re going to put you away for the day. – What? Wha- no, no! No, Katie, no! (screams) (epic music) – You know, I just don’t
know what got into him. – I don’t know. – My favorite sketch from the year was probably Zac’s I Got No Sleep Last Night. Which is a fun and funny sketch that took like a day to rehearse and put this, this fight
choreography together, it was sort of like a drunken master inspired, type sketch. As fun as it was to, like, nail a take and get it right, it was just as much fun
to see somebody screw up and like get smacked in the face. And the outtake reel is maybe just as funny to me. – A lot of people don’t get
full nights of sleep, Zac. They just fucking deal with- (laughter) – So if you haven’t seen that, check out the video and
then watch the outtakes. – Okay. So we push our fingers
really carefully together, and then- just kidding, now! (laughter) – We don’t play by your
rules, motherfucker. – Hey, guys. – You okay, Zac? You look a little- – Tired? I am. I got no sleep last night. – Sorry?
– Thank you! Ugh. I mean, it’s like, I’m going to need this whole
pot to get through the day. – We can’t listen to you tell a story about how you didn’t get any sleep. You don’t deserve anything for that. – It’s like the most boring
conversation imaginable. – No, but listen, okay? Like I’m starting my bedtime routine, nothing crazy, brushing
my teeth, et cetera, and I get into bed, and it’s just before midnight, and I cannot get comfortable. – That’s enough. – I don’t know what it is. – If you don’t shut up,
I’m going to beat your ass. – And it’s like not, and the thing is, it’s not like cramps, or like muscle stuff, it’s just like, uncomfortable? Does that make any sense? – That’s it! – Eventually I’m like okay. Let’s just try the right side. And as I’m finally relaxing, boom. A text message. (cracking) I forgot to put my
phone on Do Not Disturb! (screams) It’s a group thread. Like, people trying to hang
out on a Wednesday night? Sorry, guys, you know? I have a day job. – You know, a lot of people don’t get a full night’s sleep, Zac. They just fucking deal with it! – And the worst part is, when I saw my phone,
I see what time it is. It’s 12:45. I’m full of dread at this point. So I get up and I get
a warm glass of milk. (smack) You know.
(smack) The melatonin. And I say, Zac, (smack) oh, this is yours, by the way. I say, Zac, (screams) just chill! You know, sleep’ll come to you. – Everyone! Zac’s recounting how he didn’t
get enough sleep last night! – So I’m back in bed. I put on Bones, a show I have zero investment in, and, you know, I’m almost
sure it’ll put me to sleep. – Get him! (horde screaming) – Something’s going on with
this episode, you know? It feels like these characters
are popping, you know? It’s like if CSI were
a little more charming, and a little more fun, does that make any sense? Anyway. Two hours in, I’m like, Zac, what are you doing? You’ve got to be up in like four hours. And at that point, I’m up. (phones ring)
(moaning) Jeez. I wish I could sleep at work. (slurp) – Videos I loved working on in 2017 were the Um, Actuallys that came out. Get on the couch, getting those nerds to
answer those questions, oh, baby. Writing those fucking devious
horrible nerdy questions just really gets that sadistic geek in me off. Honestly as much fun as the questions are, it’s at the banter afterwards. Like, I still can’t believe the scarecrow has a fucking gun in that
scene in The Wizard of Oz. Go watch the Wizard of Oz, the scarecrow has a gun
in one of the scenes and it’s never addressed, it’s never brought up. Think about it. – From Jabba to Java, nerds are passionate
about a lot of things, but there’s one thing they
like more than anything else, and that is correcting people. This is Um, Actually. (upbeat music) Joining me today, Zac Oyama. – Good to be here. – [Mike] Collegehumor cast member, Ally Beardsley. – Thank you. – [Mike] And special guest, Nick Mundy. – Hi. – I have a stack of statements here. These are false statements
about the franchises nearest and dearest to your hearts. If you find the thing that’s
wrong with the statement, buzz in and correct me. Every correction must be
proceeded by the phrase “Um, actually”. If you don’t answer in the
form of an Um, Actually, you do not get the point. Let’s get started. Our first question is about Star Wars. – Shit. In order to free young Anakin
Skywalker from slavery, Qui-Gon Jinn first uses a Jedi mind trick to convince his master Watto, a Toydarian junk merchant, to allow him to pod race. (ding) That was Nick Mundy. – Um, actually, the Jedi mind trick didn’t work on Watto. – That’s correct! ‘Mind tricks don’t work on Toydarians!’ – He had like, human beard scruff, on his-
– Yeah, I, I, – Well, that was like, top of 1998’s like, we don’t have a shit for story, but like, we’ve got beards! We’ve got beards! – There is some like computer programmer, and he’s like, it’s like, check it out. We can put pubes on Watto’s chin. And like, Lucas was like, I am 100% into this. – Tell me more. – Tell me more about the beards. – More pubes on the Toydarian. – We all have a Creepy Lucas. – Yeah.
(laughter) – Tell me more about the beards. (Lucasine mumbling) – Want to see my wallet? – [Nick] See his wallet. Show him your wallet. (laughter) (Ding) – The Deathly Hallows
are the magical items won by the Peverell brothers
from Gallert Grindelwald: the Elder Wand, the Resurrection Stone, and the Cloak of Invisibility.
(ding) Zac Oyama. – Um, actually, they don’t win it from Grindelwald. – You are correct there, can you be more specific? – Um, they, instead created it. – Um, no. Can anyone be more specific
(ding) than Zac?
– Um, actually, they stole it. – [Mike] No, no.
(ding) – Um, actually, they won it from Death. – That’s correct! – Oh, shit! – They win it from Death himself, and not Gellert Grindelwald. – Man. – Hence the name, the Deathly Hallows. – I didn’t like that movie. – You only saw the movie, or did you read the book? – [Mike] Uh oh, uh oh. Uh oh. Uh oh.
– Oh! – I’m a nerd, but I’m not like, like an ethic nerd. – I’m not going to read. It must be hard to go back to normal life after you meet Death, right? – They have the primer
of being magical people, probably. (laughter) – I guess that’s, I guess that’s a good point. – Way weirder for me to meet Death, than for the guys who
teleport and shit, right? – Met Voldemort, – You think they’d be like,
they’d meet Death, and like, one of them’s just like,
that was pretty weird. It’s like, meh, I don’t know. – It’s like, slightly
weirder than normal, but. – I saw a mermaid. – [Zac] Yeah. – Yeah, but Death was also like, Hey, you going to cross this river? I’m like, no, I’ll just go around. It’s like, oh, you tricked me! Okay, here’s this crap. – [Mike And Ally] Here’s this crap! – Here’s the leftovers
from my garage sale. – It’s like the shit Death
was trying to get rid of. It’s like, I don’t want
to go on Craigslist and have to like, it’ll be a whole thing. – Just like, whoever wants this, you’re gonna get it. – Free Deathly Hallows, they’re on the curb.
– Put it up on Facebook. – Just come around,
here’s a picture of them. Well, not a picture of the
invisibility cloak, but. You know it’s there. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’s my show, I can do what I want! (ding) Moving on to question three, this is our first Shiny question. Shiny questions, just like Shiny pokemon, are worth the same amount of points, are basically the same, they’re just slightly
different and a little rarer. – [Voiceover] Spelling Bee! – Spelling in English is hard enough, but spelling in the worlds of fantasy is much more difficult. Lots of crazy vowels and consonants and apostrophes everywhere. For this question, the Um, Actually rule is waived. Your word is J’onn J’onzz. – Uh, could I ask the franchise of origin? – You can. Justice League, among many others.
(ding) – Um, actually, because
I’m just being careful. – Sure. – I don’t trust you.
– Sure, great. – J, apostrophe, O, N, N, J, apostrophe, O, N, Z? – You are so close. – Fuck!
(buzzer) – You are very close. That’s incorrect. – I wish I had listened to you. – J, apostrophe, O, N, N, J, apostrophe, O, N, Z. – No, that’s the same thing Nick said. (laughter) That remains incorrect. (ding) – J, apostrophe, O, N, N, J, (laughter) apostrophe, O, N, E, Z? (buzzer) – No, I’m sorry, that’s incorrect. The correct spelling is, J, apostrophe, O, N, N, J, apostrophe, O, N, Z, Z – Fuck!
– Is the correct answer. You’re so close. – That’s wild. – This goddamn show. – Crazy spelling. It feels like intentionally difficult. – I can’t believe how close you got. – I can’t believe you just
repeated the same thing that I got. – It’s so close. I wish I could give you that point. – (Ally) Damn. – No, you don’t. You’re happy that you
didn’t give it to us. – No, and I do, I just– – That’s why this game is a nightmare. (buzzer) – In the game Pokemon, use of the Moonstone can evolve your Clefairy into a Clefable, your Jigglypuff into a Pigglybuff, (Dings)
Or your- – Oh, fuck. – Jigglypu- um, actually! It evolves your Jigglypuff
into a Wigglytuff. – That is correct. Jigglypuff evolves into Wigglytuff.
– Yes! – Pigglybuff would be a stupid name. (laughter) – Fuck you. Let me have my thing. I moved schools right
when Pokemon got big, so I was like the new kid, and really into Pokemon, and no one at this new school was, so I came to school with a
full deck of cards in my pocket and was like, does anyone play Pokemon? And then no one did, and I was like,
– Awwww. – alright, well. I know. – Put the pokemon cards up, put the pogs out,
– Yep! – and then ready to go. – It wasn’t even pogs, it was like, motorcross and fucking. (laughter) At like fifth grade. Don’t go to Temecula. (ding) – D&D has a lot of monsters
that have been drawn directly from European folklore, such as the Kobold,
Goblin, Orc, and Troll. But also has several
monsters unique to D&D, such as the Tarrasque
or the fearsome Grell. (ding) Ally’s going for it.
– Um, actually, the Tarrasque is called Trash ’cause this game sucks. (laughter) – That is incorrect. – [Nick] You got there. (Ding) – Um, actually, the Grell is not exclusively from D&D. – No, that’s incorrect. The Grell is unique to D&D. – (Ally) You took a shot. (Ding)
– Um, actually, the Tarrasque isn’t unique to– – Nope, nope. That one is in fact also there. The Orc is not drawn
from European folklore. – Oh! – The Orc was invented
whole-cloth by J.R.R. Tolkien. Which is crazy to think about, like, Orcs did not exist
before Tolkien was like, I’ll put these into Middle Earth. And like they’re everywhere, like, – I get it, because it’s like, a Orc is just a better goblin. – That’s basically true. – And so there’s just like, what if we made goblins better? And everyone’s like, yeah. – Also, why isn’t J.R.R. Tolkien’s family suing the shit out of every fantasy, like, – Yeah, World of Warcraft, – Way to be good at business, idiot. – Yeah. In Lord of the Rings, actually every time it says Orc, there’s a little registered
trademark symbol. – No way! – No, no! It’s like– – Oh, that would be so funny! – The Orc, TM, are riding! (buzzer) – [Voiceover] What’s wrong? – This is What’s Wrong With That Picture? In just a moment here, we’re going to put a
picture on the screen, you’ll tell us what is wrong with it? (ding) Zac. – Um, actually, Nicole Kidman is not in that movie. – Nope, Nicole Kidman is in that movie. – Hmm. Oops.
(ding) – Um, actually, Val Kilmer stars in that movie, I’m sorry it took me so
long to realize that, because Val Kilmer is so fucking rad, and we should all be ashamed of ourselves. – That’s correct. Val Kilmer’s in the movie, but the poster says it’s George Clooney. This is not the George Clooney batman, that is Val Kilmer. And that is the only thing wrong with any of this image. – Cuz that movie is not
the worst thing ever! Someone’s like, hey, what was 1994 like? Here you go. Watch Batman Forever. – We should just put
that in a time capsule. – You could also tell about
that poster, it’s like, hey, there’s this new
software called Photoshop, it’s really cool. – Oh, at first glance, I thought this was his car again. – Oh shit, I didn’t even realize
that was the Batmobile. – I thought these were just like, two of, they just put the car in twice. – Oh, same. – But nope. That’s his arm. (ding) – [Voiceover] Life skills! – Our last question, as always, concerns real life skills. Bleach is a versatile and powerful cleaner that can be mixed with
Windex to remove mildew, mixed with laundry
detergent to whiten clothes, and mixed with warm water
to brighten and polish glass dishware.
(ding) – Um, actually, you cannot mix Bleach with Windex. It causes like a, noxious gas. – That is correct. – Yeah! – Windex contains ammonia, if you mix bleach and ammonia, it creates chloramine gas, which can burn your throat, make you nauseous, burn
your eyes, kill you, so do not mix bleach with Windex. – Thanks, Mom. – Let’s take a look at
that final scoreboard. Mundy, our new champion.
– Whoo! – I can’t wait for the
elimination chamber. – Then bring it out! That’s it for our show. If you notice anything that I said that was factually incorrect, and you want to correct me, tweet at the handle below. Be sure to tweet your
correction in the form of an “Um, Actually”. If you’re the first person
with a correct correction, I will give you a point. It’s not worth anything,
but it is a point. Join us next time for the
game of nerdy corrections, Um, Actually. I’m Mike Trapp, bye. (upbeat music) – My favorite sketch of this year was, I Can’t Decide What My
Last Meal Should Be, written and starring the
magnificent and brilliant Katie Marovitch. I got to direct this piece too, and so it was a lot of fun seeing Katie play this character that’s just completely unglued. When she came out of makeup, she had these bags under her eyes, and she just kind of looked insane. Now, what a lot of
people don’t know is that that’s the true Katie. So, when you watch this sketch just know that that’s what we have to
deal with on a daily basis. Enjoy, and pray for us. – Hi there! – Hands!
– Ow. (laughs) – Have you decided on your last meal? – No, not yet. – Well, you need to choose
before you’re executed. Time’s running out. – Oh, I just don’t know
what I want, you know? I just don’t know what
I’m in the mood for. – Just pick something. (gasps) – I’ve always loved like a
really good seafood paella, with fish, little shrimps, just put it in my mouth, mmm. But it takes like an hour to make, so nevermind. – Come on, ah, how about chicken? – Chicken? – Chicken. – Did you say chicken? – Chicken. – Oh.
(kisses) – Don’t kiss that. – But how would the chicken be prepared? – Any way you want. (gasps)
– Oh! What if I have like the best
chicken in the entire world? That would be so delicious! Wouldn’t that be de- ow.
(smack) – What does that even mean? Where would we find that? – You’re right, good point. It’s so subjective. Chicken being the best is so subjective.
– Oh, how about a really good omelet? – No. Keep going. – Hashbrowns? – No. – Some sausage? – No. That’s more of a breakfast. – Breakfast is good all the time! – I just don’t really feel like it. I don’t want it. – Look, I can’t do my
job until you decide. You’re holding everyone up. – Oh, I know! I really am trying, I’m trying so hard- oh! What about a full buffet? And then I can have a
little bit of everything. – No, we’re not going
to make you a buffet. – Aaah! – How about a pastrami
sandwich and potato pancakes? – Oh my god, no! I have that every freaking night! – What? – I had it last night! – How’d you get that? – I’m friends with the cook. – Rick. – Hey, have you ever seen a dead body? Well, I’ve seen 50. – How about a lobster? Huh? That’s fancy. – That’s so much money! I don’t want to put the
taxpayers out like that. – Hands! Hands! Hands! (smack)
– Sorry! – Jesus Christ, will you just hurry up? – I know. I just don’t know, I really don’t know, and I don’t want to make you mad again. Oh! Okay. How about you just surprise me, okay? And then I will have whatever you have, a little chef’s choice of a meal. – Fine, then you’re going to
have the traditional last meal. Steak, eggs, hashbrowns, and toast. – No, no! That’s! That’s just breakfast again, and I still don’t really
feel like a breakfast! – You shut up about breakfast! Ooh. What about a grilled
cheese and tomato soup? That’s a classic. – That does sound good, but here’s the thing. Cheese makes my stomach hurt. – You’re literally going
to die right after. What does it matter if
you have a tummyache? (groans) – Do you know what I just realized? If I had just ordered the seafood paella, it would be done already, and I’d be eating it! (groans viciously) – Just pick something! – What if I go vegan for my last meal? Will that score me some points? – No! Absolutely not! How could it? You shot all 50 members
of the Johnson family at their family picnic last summer! Hands! Hands! Hands! – Good point. Plus, I don’t know if I’m ready to commit to a vegan diet
for the rest of my life. – This is your last meal. You’re going to be dead. – Yeah, you’re right! Now is not the time to experiment. Maybe. – Please, just choose. You’re running out of time, and I’m going to have to
give you the exact same thing that all the other inmates are- (smack) are having today! – Yeah, that’s fine. – Really? – Yeah. – Are you sure? You’re going to eat it? – Oh, I’ll eat all of it. – Promise? – Pinky! – No pinky. – Okay. – Five feet! Five feet! (screams) – Now, that’s a last meal. (growls) – So, my favorite video
that we did this year was written by Zac. It’s called “How to Fill
an Awkward Amount of Time”. I like it because it’s something that literally everybody can relate to. But also, this sketch feels like
it could be a movie. Like it’s something
that I want to be real, and also something that
I’d like to see more of. – No, you don’t get it. If I go home, I’ll just have to turn right
back around when I get there. I just, I don’t have enough time to do anything. – Sounds like someone has an awkward amount of time. – Whoa. Honey, I’ll call you back. – Get in here. We understand that in the real world, time is a commodity. And you don’t always have enough of it. That’s why we offer
everything you could ever need when you just have like, an awkward amount of time on your hands. – Do you have, uh– – Chargers? Yeah. We’ve got iPhone, iPad, Android, MacBook, we’ve got you covered. – Whoa. – We also know you may not
want to eat a whole meal. But you probably want to eat like, a little something. We have light snacks, like chips or cookies, all the way up to heavier
snacks, like sliders. But again, no full meals. Not here. But there’s no pressure to order anything. I mean, we’re not a cafe. We’re the Awkward Amount of Time Station. – Hey, I am just a little hungry. – Do you have– – Super nice bathrooms with stalls that reach all the way to the floor so that you can shit in peace? Yeah. – Nice. Oh. What more could I ask for? – How about a movie
theater that only plays 45-minute long movies? Have fun, everyone. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Need to take a phone call
with your headphones on while pacing in a small area? We’ve got you covered. Rather just sit in your car? That’s fine, too! We have a designated parking lot. You’ll never have to explain that you’re not actually leaving your parking spot, and that you’re definitely not a creep. It’s just understood here. – I think I’m going to like it here. For another 30, 45 minutes. (laughter) – Awkward Amount of Time Station. Because, what else are you going to do? – Hey. Uh, is it possible for me
to get a room for the night? – Get the fuck out! – I’m sorry– – [Zac] They don’t do that here! – I’m sorry! – Alright, I’m good. (laughter)

100 comments

  • maximus milazzo

    this started the tide pods challenge

    Reply
  • xander cluney

    22:00 i will have what he is having please

    Reply
  • Wolverine FTW

    I’m surprised Zac didn’t break his back carrying the company

    Reply
  • TheMeepsterCat

    Love the old um actually set, and I love the new one to!

    Reply
  • Marie Song

    I DON’tT REGRET IT! Tide laundry pod is one of my favorites…..

    Reply
  • Jude

    Where is Zac’s favorite sketch?

    Reply
  • Santino Aznar

    WAIT WAIT WAIT BUT THE TARASQUE IS FROM FENCH FOLKLORE

    Reply
  • friendly worm

    i forgot that i was watching a compilation video, and for a second i yhought thr laundry pod sketch was over 40 minutes long.

    Reply
  • Internet Cancer

    How did he even film the tide pod eating scene

    Reply
  • MightyOwl

    I think deep down, everyone wants a personal awkward amount of time station.

    Reply
  • The Reaper

    For real.. am I the only one, that would love if there actually existed a place, like awkward amount of time station? The would be so awesome.. I know there is like places a bit similar or have some of the options available, but I want all of it, in 1 place..

    Reply
  • Yoshii

    Someone build the awkward amount of time station

    Reply
  • Jay J

    why do i want to mix bleach and windex now

    Reply
  • Stacie Chadwick

    Still waiting on that 2018 compilation!

    Reply
  • Jennifer LeBlanc

    All the DOGS in the OFFICE?! Sign me up!

    Reply
  • Disgraceful

    Um actually, they weren’t mermaids, they were sirens.

    Reply
  • Baby Jay

    Is anybody else concerned with what Zac actually ate in the laundry pod sketch?

    Reply
  • _/PGF_

    Damn they made some realistic fake tide pods

    Reply
  • Ahmet Kızılalper

    H

    Reply
  • Widehardest Slacker

    uhm actually the gellert brothers didnt win the deathly hallows from death death tricked all but one of them with their own wishes

    Reply
  • Ignat

    ''My time has come''

    Reply
  • Robert Davis

    What did they make the tide pods out of???

    Reply
  • My Opinion

    3:39 and my husband walks in seriously wondering WTF I am watching. 😂

    Reply
  • Gib The Grey

    The tarask is from French folk lore thou it was redesigned

    Reply
  • some slav

    blake had a cool theme and was a cool dude

    Reply
  • Insomnia Artist

    Um actually the taraque us from a myth and the main thing I remember I'd that it was stopped by a nun which is why you always bring your cleric

    Reply
  • Sparrow Hawk

    @UmActually the terrasque comes from french folklore and looks like a turtle lion thing and its names after the village it hunted (I may be wrong I’m just trying to recall stuff from memory (I’m probably wrong))

    Reply
  • Hagrid Beardman

    Wonder how they made those laundry pods so real looking…

    Reply
  • Hagrid Beardman

    Um actually, the Tarrasque is not a creation of the Wizards of the Coast.

    Reply
  • Hagrid Beardman

    Katie is "playing" an unhinged character. Now THAT, is funny.

    Reply
  • Professor Matthew :0

    The laundry pods Zac ate were fake right?

    Reply
  • Tharin Macleod

    UHM ACTUALLY THE TERRASQUE IS FROM FOLKLORE

    Reply
  • Adam Bouazrou

    What thing should I study to do a work like GH group??!

    Reply
  • Mickey Mouse

    I love at 7:20 when katie screams RAPH, GRANT, RACKA, MYSELF! I love it and it took me arounfd 5 minutes to stop myself from laughing.

    Reply
  • Arceus Lord of Creation

    "it doesn't say if he's interested in men or women"
    "that means gay, right?"

    how?

    Reply
  • in dog we trust on Instagram

    I want "Um, actually" as a real show! Please XD

    Reply
  • John Obbard

    What are the fake laundry pods made of?

    Reply
  • yves wes

    this video is perfect for anyone who had a schoolgirl crush on Zach. He's in like, every one of these.

    Reply
  • Infra Minced

    I never realized Zac had written so many great sketches.

    Reply
  • dekis Joyce

    Um actualy the trarask is from French folklore

    Reply
  • El Queero

    I couldn’t even watch the second one

    Reply
  • Hayzy Horses

    I want a real awkward amount of time station, they sound amazing

    Reply
  • G/G

    yo, idea. some candy brand should make actual candy that looks like laundry pods so that we dont have to just look at them and SUFFER

    Reply
  • Katelynn Dobson

    Um actually a Tarrasque is from European folklore, specifically southern French

    Reply
  • H Bourne

    2nd one was just weird

    Reply
  • Zephan Mayeda

    They’re wrong the Tarrasque

    Reply
  • Existing Channel

    (stabs someone with their own broken beer bottle) "just chill!"

    Reply
  • ihate Mondays

    The little Alice in Wonderland style card on the laundry pod sketch is everything to me and I don't even know why

    Reply
  • Taylor Fan101

    Um actually, the Tarrasque is not unique to D&D, it’s from the Bible.

    Reply
  • Theo Allen

    Um actually the turask is apart of a fable involving a Christian saint and a french city

    Reply
  • My old account Got deleted ;-;

    What episode of um actually is that

    Reply
  • Tubby 3.0

    I'm 100% sure that ally is secretly Billie eillish

    Reply
  • Harry Williamson

    “Just for a little while”

    Reply
  • Steve Stevens

    TOUCH !

    Reply
  • Jr Pueyo-Morales

    When you are watching this, then at the end you realized…

    "I have awkward amount of time"

    Reply
  • spazbotcode

    Ummm actually the stone doesn’t resurrect people, it lets you see the ghost of people have died

    Reply
  • MrUltimategamer44

    I think it’s time to change the channel to cliche millennial humour.

    Reply
  • Ice Ice Baby

    9:41 you can see mike trying to stop himself from laughing

    Reply
  • Alex S.

    um actually isn't the tarasque from french folklore or something? p sure my friend in grade school did a project on it once

    Reply
  • Elijah Gemmill

    Anyone see the Illuminati symbol?

    Reply
  • Rin's Everything

    It's like a fucking hive mind

    Reply
  • Ric Grim

    I need more likes to give

    Reply
  • Davidgaming 326

    I’m not gay you a holes

    Reply
  • SmOkEyJoE2323

    The tide pods sketch is just a worse version of "don't jerk off to this" by Derick Comedy.

    Reply
  • al il

    all the people in seven-way meet cute: "I love Zac's sketches!"

    Reply
  • Sammie Isn’t Real

    I want to work at college humor

    Reply
  • Mr. Thicc man

    So on the second sketch they become a hive mind?

    Reply
  • Mr. Thicc man

    So on the second sketch they become a hive mind?

    Reply
  • Square Studios

    Collegehumor is awesome. You can’t tell they’re not really trying to get as much money as possible. They put all of the sketches they talk about in the video! If they hadn’t, and they let people go and watch them separately, they’d make a ton more money. They also didn’t put any midrolls in this. That’s just really cool.

    Reply
  • AiDAN 88

    FUCKIN FINALEEE

    Reply
  • CrashvanderSpek 21

    TBT of Marching Band…
    Are they wrong though???

    Reply
  • yaicob.com

    "What a cool cameo."
    "Bye Caldwell."

    Yes

    Reply
  • yaicob.com

    "I don't wanna put the taxpayers out like that…"

    Katie you're brilliant

    Reply
  • Maggie Monroe

    what was zac eating instead of the laundry pods???

    Reply
  • Fire Feather

    I hate how everyone hates people who do this. Like we may all lose sleep but some people cant handle not having a certain amount of sleep. Like I cant function without 10 hours cause of how my body is.

    Reply
  • Apple Pie

    "you're just beautiful poison"
    like every toxic relationship ever

    Reply
  • KP바비 KJ

    So where they real tide pods or?

    Reply
  • James Kisslinger

    28:18. Um actually, the brothers from the story win it from death, but that story is implied to be just a myth, and it is assumed that the real brothers did make the Hallows themselves

    Reply
  • necro nerd

    How did I not know it was Siobhan and not something like shevanne

    Reply
  • Nathan Clay

    The tarasque is taken from European culture. A story about it and a nun that controls it to keep it from destroying a city.

    Reply
  • Idoesthings

    6:21 grant had 2 god damned pairs of glasses

    Reply
  • Idoesthings

    6:39 me and my clones after grocery shopping

    Reply
  • Idoesthings

    14:28 grant’s gums cameo appearance

    Reply
  • Evan Chapman

    Um actually the tarask is from french legend it has a lions head turtles shell and lizzard legs

    Reply
  • emily M

    To think that zac was in 10 out of 11 of the favorite sketches and wrote 5 out of 11 himself. Man. They really lost their best guy at collegehumor

    Reply
  • Ian Robertson-Makuch

    Um actually, the terrasque is from a French folk tale

    Reply
  • Lauren Walter

    Aw yeah old school Um, Actually! I forgot about those!

    Reply
  • WhippedName43

    Yo, I don't know if ya'll see these but almost every episode I've seen has an Illuminati symbol hidden somewhere, like here 1:43 look at the symbol on the computer (Zack's). or here, 6:34 on the chalkboard. another meme is 5:31 Grant's jacket says 69. So yeah, 😀

    Reply
  • HIP HOPPA

    wtf?why does it have a "try me" sign tho? lmao

    Reply
  • HIP HOPPA

    damm nerd vs jock is one of my favorites too lol

    Reply
  • Turtle Shell

    I know a gay guy named Brian.

    Reply
  • Jonathan Sauceda

    He has transsended

    Reply
  • Martha Pruitt

    Trap is waring a FLASH SHIRT

    Reply
  • Tabbichu

    I think my favorite part of the 7 way meet-cute has to be when grant takes off his glasses to reveal another pair of glasses

    Reply
  • Roxx Ram

    Caldy!

    Reply
  • Owo

    Chad dated 7 people at the same time and was also 7 people.

    Reply
  • anakin148

    Umm, actually, the tarrasque comes from french folclore

    Reply
  • Felix Parker

    Tarrasques are from French folklore though

    Reply
  • Mrs. Chanandler Bong

    Trapp looks like Bryan Dechart in some parts

    Reply
  • Jolie Ragin

    Y is Chad made up of so many ppl but they have multiple names?

    Reply

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